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Knuckleheads in the News

Monday - 7/28/2014, 9:43am  ET

C) A burglar who broke into a Texas woman's house but did not actually steal anything. Instead, police found him sitting in the sink eating raw chicken while naked.

WINNER: A


May 23, 2011

A) A Georgia man who accidentally pocket dialed police while discussing a drug deal. Police tracked the call to the Waffle House where the man works. He now faces drug possession charges.

B) An Ohio Bank Robber revealed his hood covered face to security cameras after complying with the bank's no hood no hats policy. The man fled from the scene after taking an undisclosed amount. No arrest has been made.

C) A Florida Sears Employee who stole a pair of boots from work and later showed up for his shift wearing the same boots he previously took. The employee faces retail theft charges.

WINNER: B


May 16, 2011

a) This wanted Wisconsin man was found hiding in a back yard, naked. Before police took him to jail, they dropped him at the hospital for minor injuries. The man then fled the hospital, still naked, but didn't get far. Police say drugs were involved.

b) A New Hampshire man lied about his wife's illness and death to get money from his job. The man's wife didn't know about the plan, and called her husbands company after she received a sympathy card, to let them know she was still alive. The man was arrested.

c) You might remember this local man stopped to charge his cell phone in a house he was robbing, but left it behind when he fled, after the owner came home. Well, now he'll also plead guilty to seven other break-ins. He could face up to 17 years in jail.

WINNER: B


May 9, 2011

A) This South Carolina man called 9-1-1 when he thought he was short-changed. Too bad it was after buying crack from a drug dealer. The man says he gave the dealer $60, but only got $20 worth of drugs. Police say that's when they were called. He was arrested.

B) A local man tried to break in to a restaurant, but got stuck in a ventilation duct. The man was there for 8 hours before an employee discovered his feet dangling from the ceiling. The man told police he was just looking for a place to rest.

C) This New York man jumped into the Hudson River to escape police. The man bolted from his car when he was pulled over, and jumped from a near bridge. He was rescued, and police say he thought there was a warrant out for his arrest. There wasn't.

WINNER: A


April 25, 2011

a) These Houston knuckleheads robbed a bank, and then bragged about it on Facebook. Police say after the men made a clean get away, they posted status updates on Facebook about the robbery, the next day. They were arrested.

b) A California gang member got a crime scene tattooed on his body. The tattoo stretched from his neck to his chest, and from arm to arm, showing particulars of a 2004 fatal shooting. It also led to his murder conviction.

c) Cincinatti Reds' pitcher Mike Leake had $250 in his pocket, but he's accused of trying to steal $59 in T-shirts, from Macy's. He was arrested, but claimed he was trying to exchange shirts, without the benefit of a store employee's help.

WINNER: A


April 18, 2011

a) A Mississippi burglar looking to steal pain medication, who ended up with a bottle full of beans. The drug store had been broken into several times and the pharmacist switched out the pills for kidney beans. There are no suspects.

b) A German politician caught in a sting operation for stealing toilet paper from the town hall. Authorities became suspicious after more than 200 rolls disappeared from the bathroom. Total cost of the stolen T-P is in the hundreds.

C) Two Pennsylvania men who stole a toolbox from a home and unknowingly tried to sell it back to the owner at his place of work. The victim recognized the toolbox and went home to see he had been robbed. Both men face charges.

WINNER: C


April 11, 2011

A) A Michigan Applebee's accidentally served alcohol to a toddler. The boy's mother says her son started acting strange after drinking what she thought was apple juice. After she took a sip, she realized it was margarita mix. The boy's ok, and the restaurant has since apologized.

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