A Maryland woman is using the painful reminder of her mother’s birthday around the Thanksgiving holiday to spread joy to other families.
“I lost my mom in 2018,” Ta’Kia Toomer said. “Her birthday is on Nov. 22, so every four years, her birthday is on Thanksgiving.”
Toomer’s mother Caroyn Crews, who worked as a statistician assistant for the Department of the Interior, died on April 29, 2018, only three days before Toomer’s own birthday.
Toomer’s birthday takes a sad note as it’s also a reminder that her mother is gone, and the empty space on the Thanksgiving table is another one.
“We hate the holidays, and because we dislike the holidays without our loved ones, we found ways to be busy,” Toomer said.
She found one way by emulating what her mother used to do — help others.
“In her memory, my sister, my daughter, myself, my husband and my dad, we put together our first turkey giveaway when Thanksgiving was on her birthday that year, and we’ve continued it ever since,” Toomer said.
In 2019, Toomer and her daughter Imani cofounded a nonprofit in memory of Crews. Shantae Hawkins, Toomer’s sister, is the executive director of Judge Me Now, Literacy, STEAM, & Life Resources.
“The loss of my mom right before the pandemic, it was like, ‘What can we do to help people in various situations?’ We were seeing a lot of death, we were seeing a lot of families just being torn apart due to illnesses,” Toomer said.
Scholarships, summer camps, mentorship programs, toys drives and a food pantry are some of the ways Judge Me Now helps the community. The organization also combats illiteracy and introduces students to STEAM professions.
Days before her mother’s birthday, Toomer and her husband helped hand out hundreds of turkeys along with Prince George’s County Council member Krystal Oriadha in Hillcrest Heights, Maryland.
“I know my mom would be extremely proud to see that in her honor that people are being helped,” Toomer said, with tears in her eyes. “So I know she would be extremely proud of us,”
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