WASHINGTON — Welcome back, friends.
If you’re new here, this is a yearly expedition into trying to find a handful or two of topical, timely names for your fantasy football team. We’ve been
doing it every year since 2015. So we try to avoid anything too close to what’s been done before, and also the generic names that pop up in every fantasy football league. You can find those elsewhere.
There’s a heavy local bent to this year’s crop, but we’ve got references to events happening around the league. Everything is also PG enough to be used in a work league — we’re not trying to get anybody fired here. So without any further ado, here’s your 2018 list of suggestions.
Mr. Smith throws to Washington
The most obvious headline upon the acquisition of Alex Smith was the 1939 Jimmy Stewart film. But now that he’s here, we might as well lean into it and take it the next step along the progression. Just like Smith will make his way through the progressions and eventually dump the ball off to running backs out of the backfield. I didn’t say he was going to throw downfield, but “Mr. Smith checks down” just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
(AP Photo/Alex Brandon)
A Kurt Goodbye
In welcoming Alex Smith, the Burgundy and Gold said farewell to their erstwhile quarterback, Kirk Cousins. Or should I say “Kurt” Cousins, since that’s the way team president Bruce Allen insisted on pronouncing it for months. Sure, maybe it’s just the accent. But given the way the team unceremoniously swept him out the door, you’ll never totally convince me it was unintentional.
(AP Photo/Jim Mone)
Holding out for Mack/Donald’s money
Two of the best defensive ends in the league — the Raiders’ Khalil Mack and the Rams’ Aaron Donald — are both being lowballed by their respective clubs and are both holding out of training camp for more money. While nobody would hold out for McDonald’s money, it’s understandable for anyone with that much talent to hold out for what Mack and Donald will eventually make.
(AP Photo/Eugene Tanner)
Tom Brady’s unorthodox training and diet regimens may work for him, but there’s some question as to whether or not they may have worked too well for his favorite receiver, Julian Edelman. Edelman is suspended the first four games of the season for a positive PED test, and though he’s worked closely with Brady’s trainer Alex Guerrero, Guerrero was quick to distance himself from Edelman. Anyway, Brady doesn’t want to talk about it. Nothing to see here, people!
(AP Photo/Charles Krupa)
Look who’s back in the mid-Atlantic, still bringing oblique, inspirational quotes to your social media platform of choice. Robert Griffin III will likely be largely relegated to clipboard duty in Baltimore this year, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t hoping he’ll get the lion’s share of snaps against Washington in the final preseason game in a couple weeks.
(AP Photo/Michael Conroy)
Sorry you missed Jackson (ooh!) he is for real
If Joe Flacco ever was elite, that ship has sailed. The Ravens know it too, which is why they drafted Heisman Trophy winner Lamar Jackson, even after every other team found an excuse to pass on him. Will we get to see Jackson play this year? Maybe, maybe not. But whenever we do, here’s to betting that a lot of teams are going to regret they passed on him.
(AP Photo/Nick Wass)
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