View from Venus: It’s the money, honey

Randi Martin,

WASHINGTON – What causes couples to stress out?

Number one is money, according to the 2012 Stress in America survey and Phyllis Koch-Sheras, a psychologist in Charlottesville, Va. and author of “Lifelong Love.”

“You can’t snap your fingers to get more money,” she says, “But you can support each other in working together to talk about money issues.”

Koch-Sheras adds even if couples have separate checking accounts, they’re in the same “boat together.”

Work issues also factor high on the stress survey commissioned by the American Psychological Association which interviewed 1,226 adults ages 18 and older.

Koch-Sheras advises not to leave your problems at the door when coming home. “You need to talk about it,” Koch-Sheras says. “Because if you try to keep it out of your lives, you may find you’re having closer relationships with people at work rather than home.”

She says allow your mate to vent about what is troubling him or her in the office and just offer a sympathetic ear.

The third most stressful issue the survey says couples face today is dealing with the changing economy.

This is hard to “fix,” Koch-Sheras says, but if you work as a team, you may come up with creative ways to get through tough times.

Editor’s Note: View from Venus is a regular blog by Randi Martin, who shares her thoughts on lifestyles and relationships.

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