Since the 2016 presidential election, many people have told me that political unrest divides their friends and family. In some cases, it’s so bad that they no longer speak with their parents or siblings because of hurtful, politically-charged arguments. I’ve felt the political stress, too. Recently, a disagreement among friends quickly escalated into an assault of personal attacks.
Thankfully, yoga has taught me how to handle difficult emotional situations. Otherwise, such conflicts could make me bitter and resentful of the people I love, and even cause me to lose friends, clients and family members. Here are six lessons anyone can take from yoga in order to maintain strong relationships (and sanity) in a hostile political climate:
1. Embrace diverse opinions.
Last month, I had a very liberal district attorney attend class alongside my friend, who is conservative. Afterward, they had a conversation with ease. It proved to me that when you practice together, it creates a bond. Even in the most eclectic group, people learn they are more similar than different. That lesson translates to life off the yoga mat so that when you talk to someone with opposite views, you genuinely listen to them instead of judging them.
[See: 9 Misconceptions About Yoga.]
2. Find power in postures.
One of yoga’s greatest teachings is to take a posture that exudes self-worth. Stand up tall with your shoulders back, feel attentive and ready to take on the world, and acknowledge that you have something to offer. This stance is vulnerable, but also powerful, and helps you build the confidence that gives you the mental fortitude to tackle tough subjects like politics. Developing agency through postures can help you develop thoughtful political opinions and express them easily — without attacking those who differ from you.
3. If you fall, try again.
In yoga, you often attempt the same poses hundreds of times before you find success. For example, it took me two years to balance in a handstand. I practiced every day, fell countless times and kept working on the technique until I accomplished the pose. It takes the same patience to resolve political tensions with people who hold different views. If you don’t get very far during your first conversation, consider taking on a new language or listening differently next time by using the skills yoga instills.
[See: Mantras That Get 11 Diet and Fitness Pros Through Their Toughest Moments.]
4. Just breathe.
Yoga trains you to notice when you are short of breath, and to regain it by pausing and reconnecting to deep breathing. This technique is helpful when you start to lose your patience in the heat of a debate.
5. Find your tribe.
While it’s important to be open to different opinions, it’s also important for your own mental health to connect with people who care about you and understand where you’re coming from. Students in my long-standing men’s yoga classes, for example, will often spend time after yoga to talk. They discuss serious subjects including marriage, family and financial concerns, and everyday struggles at work. It’s uplifting to hear them help each other sort things out.
[See: How to Be the New Kid in Fitness Class.]
6. Know when to let go.
Yoga is an ongoing process of shedding that which is no longer serving you. Every inhale helps you process what is creating tension, and every exhale brings you closer to leaving it in your past. This process of becoming more attuned to your thoughts and feelings is especially effective during savasana, which is typically the last posture in a yoga class. In this posture of stillness, you move into a meditation. It gives you a sense of clarity to move forward with your highest purpose.
In political conversations, the same awareness of what is and isn’t serving you is key. If you reach a point when it’s better to agree to disagree, find the courage to end your debate and move on to another topic. To save your relationships, if it is more healthy to keep your distance from that person, you need to acknowledge that. Say what you need to feel closure — and let it go.
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Can Yoga Save Relationships Divided by Politics? originally appeared on usnews.com
