Frugality is often a misunderstood concept. Frugal people are frequently envisioned as miserly bean counters or dumpster divers. In truth, those characterizations are extreme. In fact, many who espouse frugality are not that way at all; they simply look to get value out of the money they are spending.
In light of these misperceptions, a challenge can arise between partners or spouses when one is frugal and the other is not. The following tips aim to help couples in this predicament understand each other better and enjoy a more harmonious home life.
Appreciate the value of being on the same page.
Money can be a funny thing. It permeates just about every aspect of life. Many people are raised with different dearly held expectations and philosophies around it. As a result, money is a common source of discontentment for couples. In fact, money can be one of the leading causes of strife in a relationship.
What this brings to bear is the importance of communication regarding finances. This can especially be the case if one partner is more frugal in nature. They may have certain expectations or desires and that may not match up with what the other person wants. That doesn’t mean they don’t value fun or don’t want to spend money, just that they’re more purposeful about it. By finding areas for common ground it is possible to get on the same page financially and having that harmony is well worth it.
Set a budget both partners agree on.
More practically, when living with a frugal person, or any kind of person for that matter, compromise is key. That is especially the case when it comes to establishing a budget. A frugal person will likely have certain expectations and want to align things in that way.
Instead of railing against that, look for ways compromise can be brought into the budget. Again, open communication is key here. Budgeting is all about setting goals for money and will likely be even more so for a more frugal person. Look for those shared common goals and build around them.
One thing not to overlook within this budget setting phase is providing an allowance for each to do what they want with each week or month. Not only will that allow for working towards common goals but will also allow the less frugal person more freedom to do what they please with a certain part of the agreed upon budget.
Understand what being frugal really is.
As stated prior, living with a frugal person requires understanding what being frugal really means. Many think it means being cheap and never spending money and thus not having any fun in life. Rather, it means getting value out of spending. True frugality is about finding ways to make money stretch as opposed to making wasteful decisions that end up in a money losing proposition.
If one partner is frugal, it’s important for the other person to understand that key difference between being cheap and living frugally. Cheap simply means someone doesn’t want to spend money. It’s almost as if they’re opposed to it. A frugal person, on the other hand, wants to make wise decisions with his or her money.
Embrace your own frugal side.
A common misconception about frugality is that you can’t have what you want. That it means you can’t spend on things that are important to you. While that is an understandable misconception it’s also a myth. You can still have nice items and things you want while living frugally — in fact many do it.
The key with that and frugality is saving more for what matters most and spending less on things to enjoy. Frugal people try to get what they really want without overspending on it. Embracing that principle leads to both financial freedom and an enjoyable life.
Couples with only one frugal partner should look for ways to make frugality fun. Saving money can become a friendly competition to see who scores better deals on items both people want. Setting savings goals together encourages both parties to hit the goal quicker.
In the end, living frugally comes down to value based spending and being on the same page financially. When this happens, life becomes a little simpler for everyone involved.
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How to Live With a Frugal Partner originally appeared on usnews.com
