Woodsman, spare that bark
Greg in Bethesda writes: “I purchased a Fraser Fir cut Christmas tree, and to ensure it would be sufficiently hydrated for the several weeks it would be indoors, I followed your advice to soak it in a bucket of water immediately after we got it home. We first trimmed about an inch off the base and then shaved some of the bark off the sides, thinking that would help the tree absorb more water. But the tree has absorbed very little water — and it’s been soaking for over 15 hours.”
That’s because you broke a cardinal rule, Greg — never remove any extra bark from a cut Christmas tree. Whether in life or a living room, trees can only transport water through a specialized layer of cells on the underside of that bark. So recut the stump to a point higher up, where you have full bark all around, put it back in that tub o’ water, and you’ll be amazed at how well it sucks. Then you can put it up in its stand and be sure that needle-free your floor will be.
Fat trunk? Get a bigger stand
Greg in Bethesda isn’t the only homeowner who has peeled off some of the bark down low on the trunk hoping to increase water uptake. But I suspect that my version of his mistake is much more common — I once did the same thing to make a big trunk fit into a skinny stand. Three days later, you needed chain mail socks to walk across the floor. A few days after that, Charlie Brown came by and said, “are you kidding? That thing is dead, man!”
That’s because the bark is the only part of the tree capable of water uptake.
Luckily, Greg was able to saw off the bottom of his stump until he reached full barkness, and now his tree is sucking up water like an optimist at a chile eating contest. (I had to get a new tree that year long ago — and a new carpet!)
Remember this lesson well, ‘TOPers — you should always cut an extra inch or two off the bottom of a cut Christmas tree’s stump, but no barking!
Jack Frost says: “Keep Off the Grass”
You’ve all seen signs that read “Keep Off the Grass,” but did you know that it’s important that you personally heed this warning when your fescue is frozen?
In a recent press release, the Morris Arboretum of the University of Pennsylvania explains that the lovely and decorative frost that forms on turf is essentially a blanket of frozen daggers. When you walk or drive on frosted or frozen grass, the pressure forces these tiny ice daggers into the blades of your grass, shredding them worse than a dull mower blade.
Puncture enough of the blades, they explain, and the grass will first turn black and then brown, as that part of the lawn “dies a tortuous death. And damage to turf at this time of year is particularly devastating because the grass blades have stopped growing for the season.”
Luckily, we have now all learned this before we were going to tell people to park on the lawn for that big holiday party! (And by the way, I still haven’t received my invite…)
Winter turf rules: No frost, no sop, no salt
- Don’t walk or drive on frozen turf. Those pretty particles of frost are actually little daggers of doom.
- Don’t walk or drive on a sopping wet lawn either. The soil compaction you’ll cause is another big reason for failed fescues.
- And don’t as-sault your lawn with rock salt. It may make walkways safer for you, but sodium chloride can be really hard on turfgrass. Instead, stock up on a plant-safer alternative de-icer before the next big weather event.
- I’ve tried all of the de-icer alternatives and greatly prefer calcium chloride. A little bit goes a long way, it’s fairly gentle on lawns and plants and works at the lowest temperatures. Just be sure to get pure calcium chloride, and not something cleverly packaged to look like an alternative that’s actually rock salt wearing lipstick and high heels. Calcium chloride will only have the symbol CaCl on the label. If you see NaCl (sodium chloride, aka rock salt), anywhere on the bag or jug, just walk away Renee…
- … But not on a wet or frozen lawn!
Christmas countdown
- Keep poinsettias, Christmas cactus and Norfolk pines warm and indoors. They are all tropical plants.
- Replant rosemary Christmas trees into pots twice as large right away. They are terribly rootbound in their much-too-little original pots. But once they are surrounded with lots of water-holding new soil, they can stay outside (on all but the absolute coldest nights).
- Recut the stump of cut Christmas trees and pre-soak the new cut in a big bucket of water for a day to hydrate the tree and thus prevent dropped needles.
- Don’t remove any of the bark to make a tree fit in its stand. Get a bigger stand. (Trust me on this one. After 30 years, my wife still brings it up …)
- Always keep the water reservoir under the tree filled to the brim. If it dries out, the tree will be unable to take up more water afterwards.
- Keep amaryllis and paperwhites in a cool, bright spot for the longest show.
- Keep real holly and mistletoe berries away from children. They are unfortunately toxic.
- Remove a berry every time you steal a kiss under the mistletoe (real or fake). When the last berry is gone, no more kisses!
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