NBA jersey sponsor suggestions

With the NBA planning to bring sponsor logos to jerseys for the 2017-18 season, we have some suggestions. (Image from NBA.com, graphic by Noah Frank)

WASHINGTON – The NBA announced last week that it would start allowing sponsor logos to appear on jerseys for the 2017-18 season. While soccer has done this for years, it would signal a sea change in Big Four American sports. So, we figured we’d give the league a head start with a suggestion for each team. As always (like when we did the same for naming rights sponsors at Nationals Park), these are just meant to be for fun, so don’t take anything too seriously. Unless, of course, any of these work out, in which case, you know where to send the 10 percent finder’s fee. Follow the arrows, as we go alphabetically through first the Eastern, then the Western Conference. (NBA.com/Edited by Noah Frank)

NBA.com/Edited by Noah Frank

Atlanta Hawks – Waffle House The Hawks are in the heart of the south, and nothing screams the south more than the 24-hour breakfast and more chain. There’s already a satellite setup at Turner Field, and with the Braves leaving for the ‘burbs in 2017, this would keep a strong sponsorship in downtown Atlanta.

Boston Celtics – Sam Adams Few brands are as proudly Bostonian as America’s leading craft beer company. This would give them another excuse for a different varietal, brewed just for the hometown basketball team, too.

Brooklyn Nets – Google You know, like the Internets. Considering that the team actually thought about rebranding this way (before they considered becoming the Swamp Dragons) makes it not so far-fetched. The California-based tech giant may be on the other side of the country, but that’s just another reminder that the Internet is everywhere.

Charlotte Hornets – Raid The hornet works as a mascot, but isn’t exactly something you actually want any part of in real life. We’re not the first to suggest it, but why not take advantage of the natural sponsor tie-in?

Chicago Bulls – Chicago Board of Trade Sure, we could go with Red Bull, but Chicago is home to its own stock exchange, and the Board of Trade has been around for more than 160 years. Why not use the Bulls to remind everyone of strong financial markets? The red and black logo fits right in. Besides, finance guys ought to have some extra money to throw around.

Cleveland Cavaliers – Goodyear Technically, Goodyear isn’t in Cleveland – it’s in Akron, home of LeBron James, which may be even more fitting. The eternal optimism/fatalism of the town deserves a sponsor like Goodyear. After all, one of these years has to be the one, right? Actually, don’t answer that.

Detroit Pistons – General Motors This one’s too easy, but also shouldn’t really go any other way. Detroit’s the home of the American auto industry. Let’s make it happen.

Indiana Pacers – Chevrolet Chevys have been the official pace car of the Indy 500 for the past decade, and with the team nickname already tied to its racing heritage, it only makes sense to keep it in the American car family.

Miami Heat – Coppertone When most people think of Miami, they really think of Miami Beach. Just think of the giveaways and promotional opportunities available.

Milwaukee Bucks – Dollar Tree Sure, you could go the hunting direction. But why not take advantage of the common American euphemism for the dollar? Hence, the Dollar Tree, where everything’s a Buck.

New York Knicks – Heineken Did you know that a Knickerbocker is a type of pants worn by the Dutch settlers who came to New York (which was once called New Amsterdam)? Well, it’s true. So, true to its roots, we’ve given the Knicks a Dutch beer sponsorship.

Orlando Magic – Disney Orlando itself may not be “the happiest place on Earth,” but the Magic were most certainly named for nearby Disney World. Might as well slap the mouse on the jersey.

Philadelphia 76ers – Unocal 76 This is another easy fit, with the gas chain’s orange 76 ball already a visual icon. There are even a number of stations in and around the Philly metro area.

Toronto Raptors – The North Face The Raptors have embraced the motto “We The North” as the lone Canadian NBA representative ever since the Grizzlies left British Columbia for Memphis. It might be an American company, but the outerwear giant fits. Canadian winters are not warm.

Washington Wizards – Netflix Since electronic store chain Nobody Beats the Wiz went under in 2003, we had to work a little harder for the perfect Washington sponsor. And instead of looking to the past, we thought the future had more possibilities. That’s why we went with Netflix – home of House of Cards, just as Verizon Center is the House of Guards. Just imagine Kevin Spacey doing promos on the jumbotron. They wouldn’t even have to alter the red script to have it fit seamlessly on the jersey. Other suggestions included: Eastern Motors, Chick-fil-A.

Dallas Mavericks – Southwest Airlines Started in and headquartered in Dallas, Southwest flies out of Love Field, an airport it basically owns. With American Airlines, hubbed at DFW, already owning naming rights on the Mavericks’ arena, here’s another way for Southwest to cut into their influence.

Denver Nuggets – The Green Solution The legal marijuana business is booming in Colorado (or so we’re told), so we can’t think of any reason the biggest dispensary in the state wouldn’t want to get some prime publicity. Besides, Nuggets? C’mon, now.

Golden State Warriors – Pandora Not only is the digital music giant based in Oakland, but it’s revolutionizing the way we listen to music. You might say it’s breaking the record industry. Just like the Dubs are in the record-breaking industry.

Houston Rockets – SpaceX Elon Musk’s company may have its roots in California, but no team marries quite so well with the space exploration industry.

New Orleans Pelicans – Charles University It’s OK that you’ve never heard of the Czech Republic’s Charles University. Most Americans hadn’t until this week, when their medical school dean posed for a photo shoot with a pelican that the school adopted.

my med school adopted a pelican. here's the dean having a photo shoot: pic.twitter.com/DGYsQOpw5K — leyli (@_leylijoon) April 13, 2016

Yep. Anyway, anything beats Pierre.

Los Angeles Clippers – Del Ray Yacht Club With a run of winning seasons and Kobe Bryant retiring, the Clippers are primed to cut into the Lakers’ market share, and possibly their celebrity following. What better way than to remind them that a clipper is a boat, just like the ones Hollywood stars have docked down at “Southern California’s premier yacht club?”

Los Angeles Lakers – Showtime We may be a generation (or two) removed from the old Showtime Lakers. But with Magic Johnson back in the pro sports scene in LA, there’s no better time to revive the branding for a new era.

Memphis Grizzlies – Starbucks Stay with me here. The Grizzlies call their home court The Grindhouse, hence the tie to coffee. And the franchise used to be located just across the border from Seattle, in Vancouver, British Columbia. With both teams gone (and the Sonics/Thunder spoken for), I’m giving the Seattle-based chain the tie here.

Minnesota Timberwolves – Target Let’s face it, Minnesota is best known for a mall and its ubiquitous American chain discount retailer. Target’s already got its name on the Twins’ ballpark, and its logo stands alone without even needing the name on the uniform.

Oklahoma City Thunder – The Weather Channel We could have gone with something close to home in Oklahoma, but just imagine if Jim Cantore could get as excited about the Thunder as he does thundersnow.

Phoenix Suns – Sky Harbor International Phoenix is a great place … for about six months a year. The Suns play in most of the good months weather-wise, but once Spring Training and the NBA regular season end, those looking to find somewhere cooler won’t have to look far.

Portland Trail Blazers – Nike The shoe giant is based in nearby Beaverton, and is already synonymous with the University of Oregon in Eugene, just down the road. And there wouldn’t be any sponsor conflict with Adidas – that patch is just on these replica jerseys.

Sacramento Kings – Capital One It’s easy to forget, with all the major cities in California, that Sacramento is actually the capital. This can’t hurt. Factor in owner Vivek Ranadive’s recent launch of a $250 million venture capital project, and it all fits.

San Antonio Spurs – Alamo Rental Car You’ll never forget the Alamo, now that it’s plastered on the front of Spurs jerseys. Surely Gregg Popovich won’t mind a Warriors-colored patch breaking up that solid black uniform.

Utah Jazz – Ancestry.com Did you know that Provo, just outside Salt Lake City, is home to the world’s largest collection of genealogy records? You might, if there was an Ancestry.com logo slapped on Gordon Hayward’s chest.