If you’re planning a wedding and wondering where you’re going to have it and how you’ll pull it together in time, you may find yourself flirting with the idea of having it in your own home.
After all, it’s done on TV and in the movies all the time — and it sure looks easy. It may also appear to make a lot of financial sense. Instead of spending all that money on an expensive wedding venue, have the wedding in your backyard. Think of all the money you’ll save!
Talk to enough experts, however, and a theme quickly emerges: You probably won’t save money. In fact, having a wedding in your home, at least if you do it properly and have a lot of guests, can be more expensive than renting a banquet hall.
Here are the things to consider if you decide to take this plunge. Cue some bridal music, please, for atmosphere.
[READ: This Is How Much the Average Wedding Costs ]
You’ll Want a Tent
Once you’ve chosen the location, decide whether you’ll use a tent. This is also one of the first things to factor into the wedding budget because it can eat up a significant part of it.
Most tent rentals will run you between $2,000 and $10,000, according to wedding planning website The Knot. You can find tents online for less than that, but buyer beware: These tents may or may not fit your wedding needs. Walmart sells a gazebo-style wedding tent for just over $100, but pay close attention to construction, size and what kind of ground the tent will sit on. Keep in mind that a tent rental company will provide delivery and installation.
There are two basic structures, pole tents and frame tents, but there are also many additional options. Consider your budget, the size of your guest list, whether there will be dancing, dining or other events when choosing your tent.
If you want to hold a wedding in your backyard but skip the tent, nobody’s stopping you. Know that you are taking a gamble, though. A tent provides a beautiful backdrop and also a backup plan in case of adverse weather, whether that’s rain or extreme temperatures (hot or cold).
“You have to get a tent unless your Plan B is inside your home. Never think you can have an outdoor wedding without a tent,” says Danielle Rothweiler, a wedding planner and owner of Rothweiler Event Design in Verona, New Jersey.
Rebecca Mathieu, a wedding planner and founder of Simplement Nous, a wedding and event planning company in Montreal, agrees.
“Couples that decide to do weddings at home to reduce costs, I would say the must-must-must is getting a tent with walls at the minimum,” Mathieu says.
Mathieu says this will guarantee your guests will stay dry and warm in inclement weather. And the more spacious the tent, the better.
“If guests are cold, wet or not enjoying the wedding because everybody is all crowded inside, the couple is not going to enjoy their wedding day,” Mathieu says.
You’ll Want Everything Else That Comes With a Tent
If you move forward with a tent for the wedding, Rothweiler says you’ll also want to think about extras such as flooring, tables, chairs and possibly even generators, in case the power goes out, or for heating and cooling the tent.
Lighting adds atmosphere but also is a necessity if the wedding stretches into the evening hours. And then there’s decorations and whether you want draping to dress up a more simple tent.
Prepare the Grounds
A backyard wedding might be just the time to evaluate your landscaping. You’ll want a beautiful setting, both for enjoyment but also as photo backdrops. You can work with the existing framework or you might choose to upgrade part of the yard. Give yourself time and room in your budget.
Some potential projects:
— Hanging string lighting in trees and bushes.
— Adding landscape design that coordinates with the wedding colors — planting flowers, painting trellises.
— Cleaning, repairing or upgrading your deck, patio or porch.
— Turning the patio into a dance floor or building/installing a dance floor.
— Setting up a bar or lounging area.
— Keeping bugs at bay with potted plants or plantings.
[Read: 11 Home Landscaping Rules You Should Never Break]
Think About the Bathrooms
TV sitcoms never mention too many wedding guests and not enough bathrooms, but if you’re inviting over 200 of your closest friends and family, this requires some forethought.
“Even if you have 15 bathrooms, you likely aren’t going to want people going throughout your house to find a bathroom and even so, it’s still only one septic system,” Rothweiler says.
You can rent port-a-potties. There are companies that specialize in that sort of thing and you can find them online, through wedding and event planners or through local recommendations.
There’s a difference, and a difference in price, between your everyday port-a-potty and what is known as a restroom trailer. Restroom trailers are more spacious, and generally have running water and flushing toilets.
Wolfer says restroom trailers typically start around $800 and can cost $1,200 or more, “depending on how glamorous you want to get.” Also make sure you have the right number of facilities for your guest list.
Rothweiler suggests budgeting $2,500 for restroom trailers, but adds that it really depends on the size of the wedding and the rental company you select. She also suggests working with an established trailer company that has 24/7 service. If something goes wrong with those restroom trailers, they can come out and fix the problem, she says.
[7 Bathroom Renovations Under $1,000]
Feed and Care of Guests
Whether it’s a casual appetizer buffet or a sit-down meal, the food and drink requires thought and planning.
Catering will jump in this area because they have to bring in a kitchen and everything they need, Rothweiler says.
For a small wedding, you can prepare a modest meal using your home kitchen and catering options, but bigger weddings require more decisions.
“Catering can be one big, exquisite mess, especially when we’re dealing with a residential property and your beloved kitchen might not quite match up to an industrial one,” says Jamie Wolfer, founder of Wolfer & Co., an online wedding planning service for wedding planners and do-it-yourselfers in Waco, Texas.
If your kitchen won’t work for a caterer, Wolfer says you’ll have to be creative. She says your caterer may want to do a build-out kitchen, which is essentially a pop-up kitchen that they’ll set up in your backyard. You may also choose to bring in a food truck, but plan ahead for trash disposal.
Wolfer has another tip: “Remember to plan the timing of your catering well, as it often takes longer than you’d think to get all your guests fed.”
Generally, as long as it’s a free, open bar, you shouldn’t need a permit to serve alcohol. Check with your local municipality, though, to make sure. If you have a licensed caterer or a service supplying the liquor, they’ll have a liquor license. You may want to set up a bar area and ask or hire people to serve as bartenders. Beer in coolers can be self-serve, but plan ahead for ice and container recycling.
If you’re going to serve a lot of alcohol, this also might be a good time to talk to your insurance agent. Because, yes…
You May Want to Buy More Homeowners Insurance
Not every home wedding is going to need insurance, but it might, so carefully consider your options and talk to your homeowners insurance agent ahead of time.
“If you are hosting a very small backyard wedding and are controlling and limiting service of alcohol, and you are not using any third-party vendors, such as wedding servers, bartenders valet parkers, chefs, servers, etc., then a homeowners and umbrella policy may be sufficient,” says Mark Snyder, principal consultant at Hi Marley, an intelligent communication platform for the property and casualty insurance industry.
But if it’s a larger event, Snyder says, with more guests, complexity and involvement of vendors, “It is a good idea to talk to your insurance agent or professional to assess your risk factors, identify potential gaps, discuss whether any specific wedding coverages are needed, and land on a strategy for making sure everyone and everything is covered.”
You may want to consider purchasing special event insurance, sometimes called “wedding insurance.”
You’ll want to check your policy, however, to make sure you’re being covered for what you think you are. According to GEICO’s website, wedding liability insurance tends to range from $75 to $235. That would likely protect you if somebody was injured at your wedding, but you’ll want to be sure of that in advance.
Event cancellation insurance can cost as low as $130, according to GEICO’s website. That covers you if you need to cancel your wedding.
Permits
Wolfer suggests you check your community’s local regulations and noise ordinances. “Because, yes, you may need a permit, especially if you’re expecting a high number of guests,” Wolfer says. “Definitely don’t want any surprise visits from the police on your big day, right?”
Parking
The chaotic parking scene in Steve Martin’s “Father of the Bride” movie is more realistic than you think, Rothweiler says. Rothweiler, Mathieu and Wolfer all suggest having a shuttle take guests to and from your house. You may be able to partner with a local church and their parking lot.
Otherwise, you’ll need a system for parking at your home. Counting on street parking is risky, but talk to neighbors on your block and ask about using some of their driveway space. Maybe you’ve got a big yard and can turn it into a temporary parking lot, but you should have someone monitor or do the parking for a big wedding. When you’re checking on whether you need any local permits, ask whether you’ll need any special parking permits.
Plan for Post-Party Repair Projects
You could have some damage to your home by a wedding guest or a vendor, for which you may or may not want to file a homeowners insurance claim.
“In my experience, when hosting a wedding at home, the guests are much more respectful to the furniture and setting than at a hall,” Mathieu says. “They realize that this is someone’s property.”
But, she adds, “having a wedding at home opens the possibility of water damage, floors scratches by stilettos, unhinged doors …”
Chances are, though, it’s really just your backyard that you have to worry about, Rothweiler says.
“The yard in general can get messed up depending on what you put down,” she says. “For example, the tent poles, stakes and flooring. Vendors will likely need to drive across the lawn and then all the guests walking on the lawn … the lawn is definitely the obvious one.”
Rothweiler adds that professor vendors carry insurance in case of damages. “But because they’re professional, they aren’t going to cause damage,” she says. “So it’s important to only work with professional, licensed and insured vendors.”
So, that’s it, right? A tent, stuff to go with the tent, catering, insurance, possible home improvement projects and now your wedding at home is all set?
Not quite.
Home Wedding Checklist
Here are some additional things to consider.
— Pets. You may want to board them.
— Microphones. You may want to make sure your home is wired so speeches and toasts can be heard by everyone.
— Insects. If you’re doing this in your backyard and it’s mosquito or deer fly season, you may want repellant on hand.
— Staff. Who is helping the guests during your wedding? You and your relatives and friends? Or have you hired a wedding planner or a catering service? Even though you’re doing this at home, you may want to bring in some professionals.
— Neighbors. Have you talked to them about your home wedding? Are you inviting them? Have you thought about how late the reception will go, and if your neighbors will ever speak to you again if you wrap everything up at 2 a.m.?
— Trash. You’re going to have a lot of it afterward. Create a plan for managing it during the reception and removing it when the event is over.
— Professional cleaners. You probably had a cleaning service come in before the wedding. You’re going to really need one after the wedding.
If you’re trying to keep the budget in check, you may need to pare down the guest list. Rothweiler suggests not having more than 40 people at a home wedding inside your home. Mathieu suggests 20 guests, but says it depends on the space available.
That tracks with what Wolfer feels is a good number. “From my experience, a small wedding at home can comfortably accommodate around 20 to 30 people,” Wolfer says. “This allows enough space for your guests to mingle, enjoy the ceremony and maybe even bust a move or two without knocking over grandma’s antique vase.”
But the more people you have, the better the odds of something going wrong. Mathieu recalls a client with 40 guests at her home wedding and the homeowner had an issue with the plumbing.
“We didn’t have any water as of 5 p.m. That’s the kind of thing we have to be aware of when planning a wedding at home,” Mathieu says.
In any case, for all the potential headaches, there are some upsides, Rothweiler says.
“I think people really want to find a way to make their wedding day different than the rest and the best way to do that is with a unique location,” she says. “No one else is going to get married in your parents’ home except maybe your siblings, so it won’t be a place that everyone has been to before. You also get to control a lot more by having it at a private home, like catering and design of the floor plan.”
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How to Have a Wedding in Your Home originally appeared on usnews.com
