In a lot of ways, the workplace is a lot like school. Because much of whether you get hired for a job will depend on your likability. Obviously, job experience and skills matter. But if you’re going to land a job, it certainly won’t help you if you come off as unlikable in the interview.
People want to know that they aren’t hiring a toxic force. You’re going to be spending a lot of time with each other, especially if this isn’t a remote position. People want to know that they’re going to be working with somebody who doesn’t belittle everybody in their path, who doesn’t get stressed out super easily and who might be enjoyable to talk to in the breakroom.
[See: The 25 Best Jobs of 2023.]
So if you’re looking to get schooled on the topic of being more likable in your next job interview, consider these tips.
1. Try to Not Overthink This Job Interview
Of course interviews are stressful and difficult not to worry about. But once you get into the interview, you need to not overthink it, suggests Darcy Eikenberg, an executive coach in Bonita Springs, Florida.
“Worry less about being interesting and focus more on being interested,” Eikenberg says. “We over-prep and overthink about trying to impress, and that leads us to being robotic and fake. Instead, go in with genuine curiosity about not only the role, but the company overall and the person in front of you. You’re talking to a human being, and we all respond to people who are genuinely interested to learn more about us as people.”
That really could turn things around for you in a job interview right off the bat. If you’re thinking about how you come across, you’ll be more likely to be nervous. If you’re simply curious about the person you’re talking to, you’ll focus less on yourself and more on them. That should make you very likable off the bat.
2. Don’t Over Research the Person Interviewing You
Don’t overthink (once you’re in the interview), and don’t over research the person interviewing you.
Shannon Deamer, a human resources consultant for Flex HR, a human resource consulting firm in Johns Creek, Georgia, admits that this is a pet peeve of hers. “Do your research on both the company and your interviewer, but don’t make it weird.”
She says that she enjoys it when someone comes to the interview prepared and even mentions that they looked her up on LinkedIn.
“Still, I’m not impressed by someone mentioning some irrelevant project that I did 10 years ago — or something really personal that may have been discovered on a personal social media network. It actually makes me feel uncomfortable rather than connected,” Deamer adds.
3. Don’t Under Prepare for the Interview
It’s a tricky balance. You can go overboard and research the hiring manager too much, but you probably can’t over research the company you want to be hired for, and you definitely do want to come in prepared.
“Great candidates do their homework,” says Kevin von der Lippe, the director of pre-employment solutions at Catapult, a human resources consulting firm in Raleigh, North Carolina.
You want to know what the company does and be up on any recent news about the business, assuming anything has been written about the company in press releases that are now online.
“It’s refreshing to have applicants that have taken the time to learn about our company and apply their knowledge in the interview setting,” von der Lippe says, and indeed, if a hiring manager finds you refreshing, you’re racking up some major likability points.
[See: Bachelor’s Degree Jobs That Can Pay More Than $100K.]
4. Do Something to Distract Your Nerves Before the Interview
If you are anxious over the upcoming interview, try engaging in an activity that will help you clear your mind.
“The easiest way to appear likable is to calm your nerves going into the interview,” says Jessica Sweet, a licensed therapist and a career coach.
“Chances are, you are a likable person, but nerves can get in the way of conveying that,” Sweet adds. She suggests doing something like dancing to upbeat music or meditation.
“If you can reduce your anxiety through either burning (anxiety) off before the interview or relaxing it away, your nerves won’t be as much of a problem. Then you can focus on being yourself,” Sweet says.
5. Be Real in the Job Interview
That’s really what you need to do in your job interview. You may feel a lot of pressure to land the position, but you need to try and not worry about what happens. After all, you’re going to get this job or not, and if you don’t, you’ll find something else that’s great.
You just need to go into that job interview and be yourself. Even if you flub what you wanted to say and even say a few stupid things, that may resonate with the people doing the hiring.
“I believe authenticity is what really connects with today’s hiring manager,” Deamer says. “I appreciate a candidate who admits if they’re nervous or doesn’t know something rather than someone who presents themselves as knowing it all. In any industry, the expert hasn’t necessarily seen it all, so I’m turned off by people who even suggest that they have nothing more to learn.”
6. Be Curious During the Interview
“Curiosity is another top quality. Strong applicants want to know more and ask the interviewer thoughtful questions. Below-average candidates ask very few questions, if any, and only answer the questions they are asked,” von der Lippe says.
That makes a lot of sense. You can imagine leaving a job interview and having asked almost nothing about the position, everyone turning to each other and saying: “Wow, that applicant asked us nothing about the job. They must not be that interested in the position.”
And suddenly your likability has taken a hit.
7. Try Not to Dwell on Any One Topic for Too Long
Yes, the job interviewer is guiding the conversation, but you have some control over it, too, and if you tend to tell long-winded stories, you’ll just want to make sure you cut yourself off before too much time goes by.
“Read the room,” Deamer says. “Interviewers often give subtle hints when they are ready to move on to the next question or even if they are starting to disengage from the interview. Wrap up your response and avoid dominating the conversation.”
[SEE: 8 Best Jobs in Finance.]
8. Try to Make It a Conversation, Not an Interview
Yes, it’s a job interview, and you’re being interviewed. Still, as many journalists, having conducted hundreds or thousands of interviews, will tell you, you often get more information from a relaxed conversation than an interview that feels too professional and formal.
Eikenberg suggests that job interviewees are careful to not fall into “verbal pingpong, waiting for your turn to speak.”
“Aim to create a conversation, not passively sit for a presentation. Hiring is rarely ever about who gave the best answers. It’s often about how those answers made the interviewers feel. Did they see confidence and competence? Talk to your interviewer like a person, not like an almighty being,” Eikenberg says.
9. Smile
Eikenberg and many job interview experts recommend this, if you really want to come off as likable during a job interview.
“It sounds so simple, but science says we smile a lot less than we think, and a lack of a smile sends an unconscious message to others’ brains about your accessibility,” Eikenberg says. “You can be serious and still smile in ways that are authentic to you.”
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9 Ways to Be an Incredibly Likable Interviewee originally appeared on usnews.com
Update 05/25/23: This story was published at an earlier date and has been updated with new information.
