Most managers think they’re being perfectly clear when they talk to employees — even though employees are sometimes left unsure about what message is being delivered.
Here are eight common things that bosses say that can cause confusion, and how to interpret each of them.
“Are you busy?” If your boss drops by your office and asks if you’re busy, you might worry that saying “no” will sound like you’re slacking off but saying “yes” would be a rude brush-off. But most managers who ask this question just mean “Can I interrupt you or is this a terrible time?” Or in some cases, it’s code for “I’m going to interrupt you, but I’m softening it by going through the motions of asking first.” A good response is simply “What’s up?”
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“We all need to pitch in right now.” This is a polite way of telling you that your workload is going to increase or you’re going to be asked to shoulder more responsibility than you normally do. You might hear this during a busy time or when your department is short-staffed. And you’ll sometimes hear it if your boss senses that you’re not too happy about having to take on more work or put in more hours.
“You need to take more ownership.” Taking more ownership for your work means that you’re not just executing a series of activities that your boss assigns you, but instead you’re thinking of yourself as truly responsible for the success of your content. When you’re taking ownership, you’re the one who’s driving your work forward, seeking out any missing information that you need to do the work well, spotting potential problems before they arise and devising solutions to them, and drawing lessons to improve in the future. In other words, you’re taking the same sort of responsibility for your results as your manager probably takes with her own work.
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“You have an attitude problem.” If you hear this from your boss, it’s serious! It means that you’re regularly grumpy or frustrated, seem annoyed at having to do your job, resist hearing feedback about your work or otherwise are the opposite of a cheerful, easy-to-work-with colleague. You might think that if your work is good, that’s all that should matter, but people can and do get fired for attitude problems, so if you’re getting this feedback, take it as a serious red flag to reset your demeanor.
“Tell me briefly …” If you hear your boss ask for something “briefly,” that word isn’t there by accident. It’s a deliberate attempt to signal that you should be concise in your answer. You might hear this if you tend to be long-winded and your boss is nudging you to keep things shorter. Or your boss might know that there’s lots of background and context that you could supply, and she’s telling you that she’s really just looking for the upshot. If you hear “briefly,” take it to heart.
“I just need you to get it done.” Sometimes this means “I understand that there are lots of challenges to this, but you need to do it anyway.” Other times it means “I don’t want to be involved in figuring this out; I want you to handle this without involving me.” Get to it.
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“I want you to bring more of a sense of urgency to this.” Translation: You’re working too slowly. It might mean that your boss feels like she has to nudge you to move the project along or that you don’t seem invested in how quickly it gets completed. It definitely means that she wants you to be picking up the pace, probably significantly.
“You should think about whether this is really the job you want.” If you hear this from your boss, you’re giving the impression that you don’t really want to be in your current position. It could be an attitude problem (see No. 4 above), or you might seem chronically unhappy or checked out, or you might not be performing very well and your boss is nudging you to consider whether the role is the right fit for you. It’s worth giving the point genuine consideration in private, but meanwhile be sure to take seriously the fact that your boss is raising it. Good managers don’t say this unless they have pretty deep concerns about how well you’re working out in the job. Bad managers will sometimes ask it as a pressure tactic, in which case your best bet is usually to assure your boss that you do indeed want the job, while working on an exit plan.
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How to Speak “Boss” and Decode What Your Manager Really Means originally appeared on usnews.com
