Do others see you as competent and confident? If not, you’re less likely to get that raise or promotion. If you want to be recognized and valued for your abilities, you will want to take more ownership over how you are perceived in the workplace.
But let’s be honest. It isn’t easy to feel confident all of the time. You can, however, take actions to boost your self-confidence. It starts with your thoughts.
1. Eliminate the negative. You have to believe in yourself. One way to shift your thinking away from the negative is to develop mantras, which are sentences or phrases you frequently repeat to express your beliefs. It may sound a bit crazy, but there’s some science behind it. State out loud your positive intent or goal. If you are prepping for an interview or meeting, say, “I’m ready for this. I’m going to nail it.” Or if you have a stressful day coming up, start off your morning by saying, “I am competent, capable and ready for what this day will bring.”
2. Select the right words. You might be sabotaging your success by choosing the wrong words when you speak. Your word choice influences how others perceive you. Have you ever started a sentence with “this may be a crazy idea” or “I’m not sure this will work?” Don’t. You’re already discrediting yourself. Eliminate lowly filler words, such as “basically,” “um” and “so.” You can eliminate these less impactful words if you pre-plan what you will say during important conversations and meetings. Next, practice presenting what you want to say out loud and record yourself to evaluate the impact. Better yet, reach out to someone you respect and ask if they will help critique what you plan to say.
3. Make it a statement, not a question. When you are making a statement, don’t swing up your voice at the end, which makes it sound like a question. Women are often guilty of the upswing. Though it seems like such a petty thing, if you don’t fix this, people may begin to question your authority.
4. Lower your tone. Young women have not always learned how to use their voice for power. A squeaky, high-pitched voice may have been cute in school, but it lacks authority. Use the full strength of your vocal chords by speaking from your diaphragm, not from your throat. Lower the tone or pitch of your voice so it sounds more adult.
5. Use the right body language. Smiling goes a long way to convey a friendly, confident image. But there is much more to think about. Even before you head into an important meeting, stand tall, with your feet apart, shoulders back, chin up for just a couple of minutes. This is sometimes called the power pose, and doing this will energize you.
6. Understand the power of touch. Shaking hands is more than a formality. It’s an important first impression and assessment. Make sure that you use your full hand in a palm-to-palm connection. Your grasp should be firm, and you should look the person directly in the eyes and hold that stare for a couple of seconds.
7. Look people in the eye. When someone is talking to you, you need to look at them, not at your phone or around the room. While you don’t want to stare down a person, you do need to get comfortable making eye contact. Eye contact makes you seem attentive and interested.
In our world of text messages, instant messages and social media, it may take more practice to hone your non-verbal communication skills, but they could be the secret ingredient to your success.
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