Erik Goins recently received a strange request through Facebook that left him feeling uncomfortable.
The inquiry came in the form of a crowdfunding campaign from a former classmate. In it, the friend asked her network for financial assistance with a cross-country move. “The campaign started with something similar to: ‘We’re in the military and received sudden notice we have to move across the country, and the move is very expensive,'” Goins said in an email. “But [it] ended with, ‘Supporting our campaign helps the troops defend freedom.'”
It was that link between funding a relocation, which Goins says likely came with financial assistance from the military, with patriotism and civic duty that felt inappropriate. “It felt like they were playing a card,” he says. “They went straight for the patriotism, military and freedom.”
[See: 7 Deadly Money Sins to Avoid.]
Crowdfunding websites, such as Kickstarter, Indiegogo and GoFundMe, have been around for nearly a decade, helping users raise money for everything from small business launches to medical bills and parking tickets.
But as these sites continue acting as a resource for charitable giving and startup financing, questions increasingly surround the etiquette of their use. “We’re in really tricky territory,” says Daniel Post Senning, co-host of the Awesome Etiquette podcast. “Money is one of the most difficult things to talk about. Part of good etiquette around any ask for money is awareness of that fact.”
So, how do you know when your crowdfunding campaign has crossed the line? Where does good financial etiquette come into play when using a platform such as Kickstarter? Here’s what to know.
Think twice about what you’re asking. Asking for cash to fund certain types of projects may irk your network. For example, “it gets sticky when you’re asking for money for a vacation, a new car, a rent payment or a down payment on a home,” says Diane Gottsman, national etiquette expert and owner of The Protocol School of Texas.
That kind of “sticky” request annoyed comedian Dan Nainan when a contact asked him to help fund a five-figure campaign to attend and perform at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe in Scotland. “He wanted everyone to pay for him and his wife to fly over, pay for the venue, lighting and whatnot,” says Nainan, who opted not to donate. He took issue with the amounts requested for expenses such as several thousand dollars for hotel room bills. “Where is he staying, the Ritz-Carlton? If I were broke I’d be staying in a hostel for $20 a night or using Couchsurfing and staying for free,” Nainan adds.
Remember that people have their own bills to pay, financial goals to fund and emergency savings accounts to pad, experts say. If you’re uncertain about whether it’s appropriate to hit up your network to fund a bill or a project, go with your gut. “That sort of ‘Spidey sense’ is one of the best indicators that we’re in troublesome territory,” Post Senning says.
[See: Check, Please: Paying the Bill in 6 Awkward Situations.]
Don’t hide behind your screen. Of course, asking for money is uncomfortable whether you’re selling Girl Scout cookies door to door or asking your online network to fund your business idea. But sometimes asking from behind a computer emboldens people to make requests they’d normally skip.
Before you request funds, perform this thought experiment: Imagine yourself standing in front of each individual in your network and asking every one of them for cash to fund your financial goal, Post Senning says. Would you feel comfortable going desk to desk at your office or table to table at your high school reunion, requesting $5 and $10 bills to repay your parking bill? How about to fund a destination wedding? How do you picture people reacting? Use that gut check to determine whether your ask is appropriate.
Accept the “no’s.” Your friends and family have every right to turn down your request for funding. And you’re not allowed to sulk, throw an online tantrum or send a hurt email, no matter how much you want or need their support. “People get to choose about their own charitable giving,” Post Senning says.
For example, your college friend may stick to a careful, well-researched plan of attack when funding charitable projects. Another friend may not be comfortable with the financial cut that the crowdfunding service takes. (For example, Kickstarter levies one fee of 5 percent and another processing fee of 3 percent, plus 20 cents per pledge). A family member may not like the organization, product or project you’re asking money to fund. It’s his or her right to disagree with your campaign and choose to opt out.
[See: 7 Signs Your Romantic Partner Is Financially Unstable.]
Give thank-you’s. When people do choose to fund your request, prepare to graciously thank them for whatever contribution they give, Post Senning says.
Some crowdfunding platforms may allow funders to thank contributors with products, tickets, autographs and other perks. But for others, craft a thoughtful thank-you note or email to the friends and family members who made the effort to help you out. They should know that their financial support is recognized and appreciated.
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Know These Etiquette Tips for Using Crowdfunding Platforms originally appeared on usnews.com
