There is no question that simply being a teen presents a challenge for both teens and parents. Imagine the difficulties associated with being a teen and transgender. And further, imagine feeling that one’s birth sex and gender identity are inconsistent.
The shame, bullying and confusion transgender teens experience can take a toll on their mental health. It’s no wonder that transgender teens face a host of emotional difficulties, including an increased risk of suicide, according to research.
I have spoken with the parents of transgender teens who desperately want to help their children. These parents are aware of the emotional strife that their kids are experiencing. I have also been blessed to meet loving and accepting parents of transgender teens, and learned from them. In an effort to help, here are a few suggestions for other parents of transgender teens who may be struggling and in need of support.
[See: How to Find the Best Mental Health Professional for You.]
Always express support for your children. More than anything else in this world, your kids need to know that you love them irrespective of their gender identity. Your support may mean the difference between life and death. It’s well known that social and emotional support are among the best protectors against depression. You must be your child’s advocate even if the circumstances are difficult for you. If that is the case, please seek support for yourself. Parents can only give support if they too are feeling strong and supported.
Keep in mind that teens are more than their gender identity. Let your children know that they are not simply defined by their gender identity.
Do a lot of listening. We all need to be listened to and understood, but the confused and likely ostracized teen will be especially grateful to have a place to speak and vent without being judged. Do your best to understand that your child is struggling and that it’s extremely unlikely your child made a casual decision about gender identity.
[See: How to Be a Good Listener.]
Help your teen find support groups with other transgender teens. You will accomplish two things by doing this: First, your child will feel your concern; and, second, you will help your child escape the dreadful vortex of feeling isolated. Isolation feeds depression and support groups have the remarkable potential to give one a sense of belonging. That’s something everyone wants, especially teens.
Show respect for your child’s choices. Educate yourself about the correct use of pronouns in the transgender community. Talk to your child about how much information they want to share about themselves, with whom and when. Remember that this is your child’s story to tell and you must pay attention to your child’s readiness to disclose it.
[See: 10 Concerns Parents Have About Their Kids’ Health.]
Certainly, this is complicated, and the circumstances differ for every child and family. So if necessary, seek out a family therapist who has expertise in the area of transgender issues to help guide you.
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5 Ways Parents of Transgender Teens Can Help Their Children originally appeared on usnews.com
