During my 27 years of sobriety, my favorite Alcoholics Anonymous slogan has remained the same: “You can’t help someone else unless your own house is in order.” This advice applies to relationships between friends, family members, romantic partners, employees and employers, and clients and providers. Why? Because advice that comes from experience has more depth and weight. Those of us in the helping professions, for example, cannot remain steadfast in our suggestive guidance if we can’t answer “yes” to the following questions:
— Have I ever actually done what I am suggesting?
— Am I actively doing what I am suggesting?
— Am I at least willing to do what I am suggesting?
[See: 14 Ways Caregivers Can Care for Themselves.]
Ross Rosenberg, a notable author and psychotherapist, wrote an article a few years back that struck a chord with me. In it, he talked about how, during graduate school orientation, his professor asked the students if they had ever personally attended psychotherapy; only a few raised their hands. The professor told them they can’t expect to enter a career field in which they provide problem-solving and solution-oriented guidance if they have never personally experienced the process.
That’s a wise point. At my substance abuse treatment center, us clinicians need to address the mind, body and spirit on a daily basis in order to maintain both a high quality of work and a healthy relationship with our clients. If you’re a caregiver, clinician or otherwise work in a helping profession, follow these three action steps in order to keep your life in a healthy balance:
1. Seek outside help.
As professionals in the psychology and counseling industry, those of us who work at New Method Wellness, a substance abuse treatment center, value the power of connection between two people discussing a problem and outlining an effective solution. Yet, when it comes to our own well-being, we may be hesitant to seek therapeutic assistance. But helpers need help too — particularly if we want to succeed in our professions. If we are not acutely aware of our mental state at all times, we risk displacing the negative emotions and experiences of our clients into our subconscious, which creates a hostile internal environment.
The most effective form of outside help varies from person to person. Some may benefit from individual therapy; others may benefit from a life coach or a spiritual adviser. Regardless of the source, outside help provides an effective release for pent-up emotions, potential transference (or internalizing the negative emotions and experiences of our clients) and the weight of a helping occupation.
[See: How to Find the Best Mental Health Professional for You.]
2. Pray, meditate or both.
In the midst of seeing patients in the depths of their mental disorders, on the firing line of a disease such as alcoholism or addiction or coping with the inner turmoil that originates from childhood pain or post-traumatic stress disorder, it’s very easy to take on this negative energy and let it have its way with our subconscious. That’s why it’s important to establish a relationship with a greater power — no matter your religious and spiritual preferences.
Gratitude meditations, breathing techniques, affirmation meditations and prayer are the perfect antidotes to negative energy and spiritual exhaustion. The simple act of a 10-minute meditation can result in an instant change in your own energy. There are plenty of guided meditations on YouTube that can help you at the start of your meditation practice. You can also find a collection of meditation apps on your iPhone or Android that provide guided meditations.
3. Exercise and eat well.
The last prong of the mind, body and spirit trifecta is generally the most difficult to implement into a daily routine: Eating well and exercising. Food and excessive amounts of TV are an easy source of comfort for most of us; turning to them is a simple way to check out of our problems and our negativity. Unfortunately, this losing combo contributes negatively to our overall productivity and well-being. Exercise, on the other hand, is a great release.
To quote the character Elle Woods from the comedy “Legally Blonde,” “Endorphins make you happy, and happy people just don’t kill their husbands.” There are countless studies showing that simply walking for 30 minutes is enough to boost your mood and decrease anger and hostility towards others.
Your eating habits also affect your physical health. A nutrient-rich diet of fruits, vegetables, protein, adequate carbohydrates and healthy fats not only helps you feel better physically, but also contributes to your overall mental health. A well-balanced diet provides you with the energy you need to push through any negativity and to take the steps necessary to take care of yourself. By maintaining a routine with regular mental health check-ins, meditation, exercise and healthy eating, we are preparing ourselves for the day when we inevitably find it hard not to take work home with us.
[See: 11 Simple, Proven Ways to Optimize Your Mental Health.]
While we are not perfect by any means, and we may not find ourselves feeling 100 percent every day, we can still make an effort to keep our mind, body and spirit in check with self-care. Remember, asking for help is healthy. In fact, it is probably the best thing you can do for your career.
More from U.S. News
Apps to Mind Your Mental Health
5 Reasons Your Doc Might Prescribe Meditation–and One Reason She Won’t
8 Things You Didn’t Know About Counseling
The Best Thing Helping Professionals Can Do for Their Careers originally appeared on usnews.com
