Guests face increasing costs to attend weddings

WASHINGTON — The invitations are out, the dress purchased and a hotel booked. After months of preparation and a maxed out line of credit, the wedding day is finally here.

Did you remember to buy a gift? Because it’s not your wedding day, of course. You’re not even in the wedding. In fact, it’s your second cousin’s wedding who you last saw three Thanksgivings ago.

There had better be an open bar. 

The cost to attend a wedding is up 12 percent from last year. With gifts alone averaging more than $100, attending someone’s special day costs hundreds of dollars. And weddings rarely come in singles.

CNBC consumer reporter Kelli Grant says travel is a big part of the expense and that, on average, guests spend $673 per wedding, according to a new American Express survey. This consists of everything from renting a car to airfare, but the little things also add up.

“For wedding guests, a lot of the time you need to scrutinize that invitation carefully. Like, if they do a blacktie wedding for example, that, of course, means you’ve got to rent the tuxedo or rent the gown. If you’re a family and it’s an adults-only wedding, then you’ve got to factor in the cost of getting a babysitter for however long that period you’re away,” says Grant.

Cash bars and valet parking also add to costs.

To try saving money, Grant suggests looking for deals on hotels or going in on a room with friends. And, if necessary, be upfront and let the couple know you can’t afford to attend.

“Be really honest and just say you’d love to attend and you’re happy for them but it’s just not in your finances right now for you to travel across country or whatever that entails.”

Even after travel expenses, clothes and hotels, wedding-goers can’t forget the gift. The American Express survey finds the average cost of a wedding gift ranges between $100 and $150.

But Grant says attendees who’ve already broken the bank to get to the ceremony don’t need to feel obligated to buy a big present.

“Your gift is always part of that budget and if you have to spend a lot on travel … maybe that does mean you don’t get them the stand mixer and you get them the engraved photo frame instead,” says Grant.

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