In WTOP’s series “Parenting Your Parents,” reporter Sandra Jones delves into a difficult task many adults will eventually face — taking care of your parents.
Here in Part 2, Jones spoke to experts about when and how to manage their finances before it’s too late. Read Part 1 here.
Have you ever wondered when the best time is to step in and handle your aging parents’ finances?
It can be difficult to talk about money with your aging parents. But experts say the sooner you do it, the easier it will be to protect their well-being.
Amy Goyer, a caregiver expert with AARP, advised creating a list of your parents’ personal information, financial accounts and bills.
“Do they have retirement savings? What’s their budget? What’s their income? Do they have debt?” Goyer offered as examples of questions to investigate.
If you start to see problems or mail piling up, Goyer said they may not be opening their bills at all. Check to see if they have auto-pay set up for bills they can pay online and if it is going smoothly.
Goyer said you can listen out for warning signs. For example: “If you hear them say, ‘Oh, I overdrew my checking again. I didn’t realize that bill was coming in,’ or they’re having trouble tracking that.”
Once you begin talking with your parents about their finances, Goyer suggested making sure that you approach it in a caring and loving way.
”You’re not trying to take over their lives. You’re not judging them, because if they know they’re not doing quite what they used to do, they’re going to be feeling bad about themselves,” Goyer said.
Getting the legal right to handle your aging parents’ finances can make the process much easier and less stressful.
But do you know where to start to avoid a crisis later?
Experts say you should find out what the rules are in your state and sit down with an estate planning attorney or go to a seminar.
Attorney Amanda Singleton with AARP said it’s critical to have a clear will or trust in place.
“Those dictate what happens, the people that you nominate to close up your final affairs, to distribute inheritance to people or charities of your choosing and to really manage any final loose ends that you have here,” Singleton said.
She said it can save you a lot of time and stress.
“When you’re not wrapped up in a court case, when your wishes are clear and everything has been expressed or done through transfer on death or beneficiary designations, that reduces the ability for conflict. That reduces the opportunity for family members to disagree and duke it out in court,” Singleton said.
How to financially prepare your parents for moving into a facility
At some point, your aging parents will deal with life-changing health conditions and may not be able to live on their own. So, moving them to an assisted living facility could be the best option. But how do you financially prepare them for it?
Experts advise planning ahead to avoid a hefty bill down the road. But remember, it’s all about their quality of life.
Gerontologist Marlena del Hierro with Seniorly.com said to compare the cost of your parents aging at home versus in an assisted living facility.
“It helps so that it’s not a sticker shock, because senior care is expensive. Unfortunately, Medicare does not pay for senior living,” Del Hierro said.
She said finding a financial planner and utilizing other resources can help your parents make the best decision.
“Whether you’re reaching out to your geriatric care manager or a senior living expert, those people exist. Perhaps your family, your friends and your family, people who have gone through this, are other great resources for you. You shouldn’t do this alone,” Del Hierro said.
And don’t forget to take a look at your own finances.
“Make sure you’re aware what you need to be able to save and that you’re living comfortably or as comfortable as you can because you might be contributing here and there to your loved ones’ needs,” Del Hierro said.
Join Sandra Jones for Part 3 of WTOP’s series, “Parenting Your Parents.” Jones talks to experts about how to decide between assisted living and other senior care options for aging parents.
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