WASHINGTON – Mark Zuckerberg, Nicolas Cage and Mark Wahlberg were all present to give their soundest advice to Harvard students on their annual College Class Day this year.
“I just wanted to give a congrats to all, but more of a congrats to me!” Zuckerberg said, outlining his successful completion of the “Harvard Trifecta” of starting a company, becoming the subject of a Hollywood movie and marrying an Asian doctor.
Action movie star Cage unveiled his plans to tunnel into the “bowels of the Widener Library” to steal the ancient Gutenberg Bible and give it back to its rightful owner, comedian Steve Guttenberg.
Wahlberg instructed everyone to tell their mothers he says, “Hi.”
These are among the routines “Saturday Night Live” and viral video wunderkind Andy Samberg used to entertain the assembled masses Wednesday before their graduation from one of the country’s oldest institutions of higher learning.
He began his featured guest lecture — which was followed by an address from Rep. Barney Frank, D-Mass. — by dancing onstage to Adele and romantically embracing the student who gave his introduction. The shenanigans that followed held up to his SNL standard, and included berating the dean of students for not issuing the UC Santa Cruz and NYU grad an honorary Ivy League degree.