Today’s brides and grooms may not need another set of frying pans. They may be marrying later, often after living together, which means their shelves are already stuffed with sheets, towels and dinnerware. In fact, they may need to declutter, not accumulate more stuff.
So, instead of registering for wedding gifts at a department store, these modern-day couples may use a cash registry, asking guests for gifts of money, which they earmark for specific expenses, including honeymoon costs, home down payments or charitable giving.
As a wedding guest, you may be seeing more cash registries than ever before. “This is a trend in the past 10 years, and the past five [years] especially,” says Lizzie Post, co-president of the Emily Post Institute, which provides training and resources on etiquette advice, and co-host of the Awesome Etiquette podcast. “Especially as so many people are getting married later in life, priorities and wants and needs and thoughts about what makes a great gift have changed.”
[See: 7 Signs Your Romantic Partner Is Financially Unstable.]
Here’s how cash registries typically work: Couples create a profile with a registry service. From there, the lovebirds select the financial goals they want guests to fund. For example, if the newlyweds want guests to help pay for their honeymoon, they could provide the option for guests to pay or chip in for their airfare, individual nights at different hotels, excursions, train tickets and more. The guests can typically choose which part of the honeymoon they want to direct cash toward.
Some couples may even create a customized cash fund, asking guests to fund trapeze lessons, a new business, home renovations or anything else they’d like.
Some popular cash registry services include Honeyfund and Traveler’s Joy, which primarily focus on helping couples fund their honeymoon. Blueprint Registry offers a cash registry service with options to have guests stock honeymoon funds, home funds, charity donations and other experiences. The Good Beginning specializes in charitable giving. Many of these may also incorporate traditional wedding registry gift options into their interface.
For couples entering marriage later in life, a cash registry might sound like a tempting option. “Our core couple is already living together,” says Sara Margulis, CEO and co-founder of Honeyfund, a honeymoon registry platform. She adds, “They’re striving for that perfect Instagram moment. They understand that travel is a bonding experience with your loved one, and they don’t want to forego their honeymoon because they’re trying to put on a wedding on a budget.”
But for couples opting to use a cash registry — or guests wondering how to use one — there may be some unfamiliar challenges, including how to handle processing fees and other etiquette hurdles.
[See: Check, Please: Paying the Bill in 6 Awkward Situations.]
For couples nervous about using a cash registry, experts recommend pairing one with a traditional gift registry, so guests can still buy a blender or china set instead of, for example, funding your whale-watching excursion in Scotland. A cash registry “can be an option, but it shouldn’t be mandatory,” says Diane Gottsman, national etiquette expert and owner of The Protocol School of Texas. She notes that a link to the registry should be placed on the wedding website, not on the formal invitation.
While cash registry services typically market themselves as free, couples or guests will likely need to pay a fee for the platform to process certain gift funds. For example, on cash and gift registry platform Zola, the fee to process credit cards is 2.5 percent of the gift amount, which couples can choose to let the guests pay or absorb themselves on behalf of the guests. Honeyfund has a free option for online gifts and gift cards, but cash payments made through WePay or PayPal incur a fee of 2.8 percent of the balance, plus 30 cents. Traveler’s Joy deducts a 2.95 percent service fee from gifts given via credit card and charges the gift-giver 2.95 percent, plus 99 cents, at checkout. Couples are allowed to cover fees, ask their guests to pay the fees or split the costs of the fee 50-50.
Etiquette experts are split on whether guests or newlyweds should cover the registry’s processing fee. After all, it might turn off a guest to discover that a percentage of his or her gift is going toward pesky upcharges. Of course, experts note, guests should be permitted to dodge the fee by writing a check, purchasing a traditional gift or giving cash directly instead. Cash or check gifts can be included in a card, Post says. If you are using cash, make sure to hand off the envelope in a way that prevents it from getting lost — don’t just throw it on the gift pile, she says.
[Read: Wedding Guests, Learn the Answers to These Money Etiquette FAQs.]
Couples should remember that their guests have different budgets when setting up a cash registry, experts say. Just like a traditional registry should offer items at a range of price points, newlyweds should offer funding options at a range of levels. “Bring those price points really low,” Post says. “That way, people do have options.” They can always bundle a few fixed costs, like a train ticket with a museum entry fee, to create a larger gift package if necessary, Post says.
As long as couples provide lots of options for budget-conscious guests, including more traditional registry options, experts say cash registries can work well. Guests can give as much or as little as they want toward the couple’s financial goals while the newlyweds avoid receiving yet another unneeded toaster oven.
More from U.S. News
9 Ways to Add Fitness to Your Wedding
10 Offbeat Ways to Earn Extra Money
Are Cash Wedding Registries Worth It? originally appeared on usnews.com
