You’ve heard the best way to find a job is by networking, but you’ve tried it and it didn’t work. Before you abandon the idea permanently, try assessing why it didn’t work for you. Networking is credited for helping numerous people land new jobs. Maybe you should figure out how you can make it work for you, too.
One of the most important rules of networking is to remember that the conversation isn’t all about you. Show genuine interest in other people you meet. You may be anxious and afraid, but put the needs and interests of others before your own. And in order for networking to really work, you need to develop a “give to get” mindset. Offer your advice, help or information with every encounter. And one more rule: Never stop networking. It’s easier to network when you have a job. You feel like you have more to give and there’s less pressure to find a new job quickly. Read on to discover nine common ways you may be approaching networking from the wrong angles.
[See: 16 Things You’re Doing All Wrong on LinkedIn.]
Expecting a job to land in your lap. You will not find instant gratification from networking if your goal is to land a job. However, if your mission is to meet interesting people who may be able to enlighten you or refer you on to others, then you’re doing it for all the right reasons. Change your expectations and you’ll have much better results.
Bad messaging. It is up to you to help people understand how they can help you. If you want the right types of job leads, you have to be specific. Tell people the names of companies you are interested in and list some of the variations of job titles. You can even go one step further by explaining what you are good at doing. Again, the more specific you can be, the better. Don’t just say you are good with people. Explain the customers you’ve served and how you’ve helped them.
Only wanting to speak with the “right” people. Anyone can be the right person to network with. If you are being overly selective in whom you will meet with, you may miss an opportunity. By all means, be clear about the companies and roles you are interested in but don’t dismiss meeting with someone just because they don’t hold the right position. You never know whom they may know.
[See: 10 Ways to Perfect Your Personal Brand.]
Not willing to take steps to build a relationship. Networking isn’t like a one-night stand. You are nurturing a friendship and that takes time. Before you begin probing for information, take time to learn about the person you are meeting. Ask them questions about what they like about the work they do and the company they work for. Listen and learn. You may find you have more in common than you think. And don’t be afraid to ask how they spend their free time. When you learn about someone personally and professionally, it helps form a stronger bond.
Trouble making small talk. Many people dislike networking and talking with strangers. But there are things you can do to help get more comfortable with small talk. It starts by knowing what to say when you meet a complete stranger. Remember meeting new people feels awkward for many of us. But even the most introverted networkers can carry on a robust conversation if they have developed a repertoire of icebreakers. Use this to trick yourself and develop a list of open-ended questions to spark a conversation and get the person talking about things that interest them. Also stay up to date on current events in your city and in your industry so you can ask questions about those as well. Last but not least, do a little background research on people before you meet them. You can use this intel to ask questions about their interests.
Being selfish. If you start most conversations with “It’s been awhile since we’ve spoken, but I need your help,” you are probably coming across as selfish. Here’s the deal. People want to help, but they have to feel valued first. Don’t just leap into your agenda without taking care of the niceties first. Sincerely ask how they’ve been and what they’ve been up to.
[See: 25 Best Business Jobs for 2017.]
Only networking in groups. Attending networking groups isn’t a bad thing, but it isn’t the only way to network. One-on-one networking is usually much more effective. It allows you to have a more in-depth conversation and learn more about each other. Plus, you’ll have the person’s undivided attention. Use group events to meet new people, but follow up with an individual meeting to strengthen the relationship.
Mass emailing is not networking. If you think you can kill a few birds with one stone and email a form letter to all your email contacts, think again. Seldom do these generic emails generate a response. Each recipient assumes someone else will be better suited to help you and as a result, few respond. This tactic is impersonal and violates the basic rules of networking. Take the time and email your contacts individually and personalize each message.
Not smiling. It’s fine to be serious. But if you are not smiling you send a negative message. Research has shown that people respond better to those who are friendly and smile. You’re more likely to get the information you are seeking if the person you are talking to likes you. Networking should be enjoyable, so smile.
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Why Your Networking Isn’t Working originally appeared on usnews.com
